its all about the money

if you were given a chance, to wish for three things what would they be?i bet most of us will wish to be super-rich, rich, or at least richer.who doesnt like to be rich?however, as for me, money is nothing if ur soul is empty.money is rubbish if u are not happy.money is of no use if u r alone.

i love to live in moderation.as for me, pray for wealth, dont chase for wealth.if u once own it, be grateful for it, dont ask for more.

cukupla kaya sekadar untuk hidup.kaya itu baik kalau mendekatkan kita dgn Allah, mendekatkan kita dgn family, buat kita bahagia, membahagiakan isteri, and membahagiakan diri

a question popped in my mind once when i was watching a malay drama on evening.why most of the super-rich people would do almost anything to get richer, when they are already swarmed with wealth?the answer is, money, in excess, will exert their very own toxic effects. people will long for more, never never will they be contented.that is lust.

note that almost of malay drama convey this kind of living.dramas which portray rich people who are willing to kill others, even their families, and other sorts of wrong doings-blackmailing, bribery, prostitution, everything it takes for more money.it kills,you see?i think people(at least me) are sick of that lame old ideas.enuff already.(that is one of the reason i think nur kasih rocks.it portrays the 'good side' of reality)

Ya Allah berikanlah aku rezeki supaya aku tidak perlu untuk meminta2 kepada orang lain.Dan janganlah smapai kekayaan itu menjauhkanku dariMu.

whats up with jalang?

another malay movie is out.jalang.

first time i watched the promotional advertisement out on tv, i was immediately disgusted by it.to add to it, my brothers were with me, staring at the tv screen, wondering what was it all about.and today, a talk show presented the director of that particular film.i watched so eagerly, as i want to know what makes the director so keen on producing that kind of film.

my anticipation was:

untuk membuka mata masyarakat malaysia, yg pelacur2 juga manusia, mereka tersekat dlm kesempitan hidup.masyarakat harus membuka mata supaya tak mendriskriminasikan mereka.

untuk memberi pengajaran kepada mereka supaya tidak terjebak yadaayadaa...

seperti dijangka.jawapan dia agak2 sama.untuk educate masyarakat ttg apa 'jalang' itu sebenarnya.dan spt yg diatas.

hissh!nonsense!whatever your good cause is m director, the negativity of ur filthy piece of work outweigh any good it brings.takpayah nak educate masyarakat, malaysian citizen are well educated dah pasal benda2 macamni.u dont have to provide unnecessary exposure for kids,because with or without it, they will eventually know.kenapa la nak buat iklan gempak2 kat tv, musim cuti plak tu, bagi budak2 tgk..what for?educational purposes?daripada budak2 tak tau jadi tau.tayang mase raya haji plak tu.

i think ur so-called niat murni just nak menutup agenda sebenar, that is to exploit sex and women to make money.and i think those who r dumb enough to buy tickets to watch ur film are those who are of the same species as u are.

sick.

im so sick of lots of things now.

I am sick of the world today. evil lingers at every inch of the world.i hate to hear small kids being murdered.i hate to hear houses are being bulldozed to the ground.i hate to hell that the fact ppl are doing absolutely nothing about it, and hate myself too for not bringing any good to the world.

i am sick to see the norms of the world today.killing is a norm.bisexuality, homosexuality, pornography, homicides, excesive alcohol drinking, prostitutions are norms.i hate to see muslims drink alcohol, muslims go to clubs. i am not an angel, i am not pious either. i hate myself for still not be able to be real muslimah. but i hate, i loathe to see my religion to be fooled around.

I am sick of people playing dirty politics.

I am sick of people, society or organizations funding so much money for stuff like concerts, talentshows, entertainment awards and not even bothered about those who are in need.

I am sick of smokers. I am sick of the government working on anti-smoking campaigns, but still, prosper with the massive income cigarettes taxes offer. Smoking is haram, but still I see pak-pak imam light up the cigars on the way to the mosque. For those who smoke, I am sorry if you die sooner than you expect, but hey, you deserve it!

enough hate for today.

teater punya kisah

someone very close to me loves theater so much.he grows up with theater and acting. i never liked such thing. i never liked that particular person to do theaters, apa lagi nak berlakon profesionally. i never wanted to get involved in such thing either. however i signed up for IMU's malay cultural week's thetaer production team. i decided to do so because Muna, the director is a friend of mine, we are in the same batch.kira nak support kawan la ni. she loves theater so much as well. she has lots of experiences, and i have faith that she'll be able to make this year's theater a blast. i signed up, and muna elected me be the stage desingner.i had a teeny weeny experience in stage design back in boarding school, so i accepted the job.so, sejak sebelum puasa haritu, i have worked pretty hard for this theater. awal2 tak terasa penat, tapi about a week before the performance i stayed back late(at around 2am) everynite for the theater.study pun tak berapa.nasib baik the system that time was endocrine, a little lighter than the other systems, so i think i could manage to revisit the system later, maybe?
fast forward a bit...after the first theater , Bukan legasi lalang(it was a classical malay theater)succesfully been performed, i was so excited and i was overwhelmed with satisfaction. most people who came said it was a great theater.mungkin kalau university lain dtg and tgk, they may or may not feel so, i dont know.but who the hell cares, as long as we are satisfied ourselves.let us, IMU students set our own standard.after all, i think it was an entertaining show.
Gadis di kuburan's next.at first i felt that Gadis di Kuburan does not have the 'kick' that BLL has. BLL is good for that it has awesome silat, nice malay dancing, and played by many talented students.sape kata student IMU tau std je?however, GDK is not boring after all.though it has all those long monolouges, and mushy love lines, it has succeeded to entertain people, and shed tears of the audience.(ye ke?lebih2 je aku ni)i feel that GDK has its own strength too.mana tak nye, seminggu aku dok nyanyi lagu pelangi petang tu sorang2.just sad that some ppl and lecturers(who attended GDK) didnt come for BLL.bcos i think Malay culture is more potrayed in BLL. and IMU ppl love silat, dont we?hehe..

sekarang, demam teater belum habis sepenuhnya.it was amazing to join this production team. It has brought me an amazing teamwork spirit(i miss the crews), made me know ppl i didnt ever bothered to know before, esp juniors sem 2 nd 1.and amazingy i also view theater i quite a different way now.dulu, kalau tgk tv, org tak pandai berlakon, kutuk2.skrg baru tau sshnya nak hidupkan emosi tu.(cheh, dh jd orang seni plak).dan dulu2, selalu memperkecilkan benda2 lakonan ni.tp sbnrny, it takes a lot of knowledge, and hardwork to be able to act.tgk skrip je dah punya panjang nak hafal.kalau aku hafal skrip tu, maunye keluar sem 3 punya syallabus dr otak aku. and haritu, baru muna suruh aku berlakon a tiny role(for about 3minutes, aku dah tergelak2 dh)i seriously cant!

orang kata, once we got ourselves involved in this, nanti got addicted.it may be true.tapi teater kat imu setahun sekali, mana nak addicted nye.most probably next year tak join kot such thing, sbb sem depan ada major exam(yay im graduating from Bukit Jalil campus!), but i will still support this kind of events.any events la generally.i think we should always get ourselves involved in co-curricular stuff.so takde la rasa diri ni bosan sangat.join la community service ke(huu if i could turn back time i am going to make sure i attend the weekly community service i'd signed up for back in sem 1), usrah ke, sports(ni i cannot help it la), or anything for the matter of fact.socializing in clubs etc not included yea ppl!

anyway, the point is, joining this event was a cool experience for me.and theater is not boring after all.but strictly for occasional leisure. never more.

spank your kids-not!

Kids Who Get Spanked May Have Lower IQs

Studies Show Link Between Getting Spanked and Poorer Scores on Intelligence Tests
By Salynn BoylesWebMD Health News

Reviewed By Louise Chang, MD

Sept. 24, 2009 -- Parents who spare the rod just might end up with smarter kids.
Two new studies suggest that children who are spanked have lower IQs than children who aren't, regardless of where they live.
In one study, researchers analyzed the intelligence scores of roughly 1,500 children in the U.S. who took part in the National Longitudinal Survey of Youth. They found that these scores were slightly lower among children whose mothers reported using spanking as a form of discipline.
In the other study, national average IQ scores were found to be lower in countries where spanking is common.
The research was led by University of New Hampshire sociologist Murray A. Straus, PhD, who has studied the impact of corporal punishment on child development for decades. He is a vocal opponent of the practice.
Straus was scheduled to present his findings Friday in San Diego at the 14th International Conference on Violence, Abuse and Trauma.
"The best kept secret of American child psychology is that kids who are not spanked are the best behaved and do the best in life," he tells WebMD. "You won't find that in a single child development textbook, but it is true."

aku jarang2 kena pukul.sepanjang hidup ni, rasa2nya dlm 2 or 3 kali je.tu pun lembut2 je.IQ aku tinggi kah?hehe..ntahle.yang pasti aku tak pass IQ test nak g adelaide uni 2 tahun lepas!heee~

cinta

teringat zaman kecik2 dulu..semua orang mabuk nak bercinta.sometimes, when i come to think about it, it makes me laugh.how can little kids(or growing teenagers) indulge so much in love?dulu2 dtg sekolah tak abes2 ingat boyfriend, tulis2 surat(dulu2 takde phone), masa rehat dating2 tepi kantin(aku tak, aku pengawas.hehe)main tarik2 rambut ngn sape yg kacau kita nye pakwe(again, aku takpenah buat.ok?), yg paling common skali, balik skolah sama2(ni penah=P).those days are memorable.ada yg fun smpai tanak lupa, ada yg takmau ingat lagi..skrg tgk budak2 bercinta, rasa nak termuntah..tp dulu2 aku pun sama, tak sedar diri btl.

but when i reach adulthood, love is never for fun anymore.love is not something that we ask, it is something that comes when we least expecting it.memang ramai lagi orang yg sibuk nak carik boyfriend, carik jodoh, ada jgk yg tanak langsung ada boyfriend, tanak mengelakkan terjebak.to have or not to have boyfriend, is not an issue.bila takde boyfriend(or gf) takpayah rasa risau takde jodoh, the time will come. tapi, for those yg anti dgn 'couple2' thingy ni, kena faham,love is not smething that u can just erase or delete. love remains though a relationship does not lasts.to seperate two loving souls is mean.hanya ada satu jalan, nikah.its not always readily possible..ada byk tanggungjawab, and expectations from others.yg perempuan kena faham, how hard things can be for a man to get maried.diorang yg rasa beban, bkn kita.so, nak tak nak, we have to understand.and in the time being, menjaga diri sebelum bernikah(tough part, huh?)

love is not about the fun.though it was before.for me, loving who i love now, is not always easy.it is at the same time fun, but i dont want to love for the sake of the fun and happiness it brings.we have to bear with the hardship that comes along with it.i cherish every happiness, and every hardship love has to offer.


love is not a major thing in life.but still, we need it as a complementary. love is not about going out together, celebrating anniversaries, expressing love in facebook etc etc.love is about companionship.for me, if i have loved the right one, do not ever turn back. take the relationship seriously.i have hurt some people in my life, and i regret that.i do.but i am thankful for it has end my search of true love, and now, i have found (i hope) the true love.

i am really thankful for the fact that we have survived the hardships of love for years now. u r a great person, even there are times i cannot stand u, i am thankful for that. i dont want u to be anyone else but u.i want u to know, i have never taken into account what u have, or what u dont have when i decided to love u.but, because of who you are.i dont love you because of u r hot, or goodlooking(if u really are la), i never cared about that at all.i will even love u the same(or more) when u turn 60, or 70 or 80, when u hv that deep wrinkles on ur face.

this is how love should always be.

akhirat dan duniawi

macam2 perangai orang masa bulan ramadhan.i dont want to say i am satisfied with the past ramadhan, i still have to improve a lot.lagi2 la masa bulan puasa hari tu, i was busy in preparing for the Malay Cultural Week theater next week(i am one of the crew).mmg aa mcm teater biasa2 je.. nama pun bdk IMU yg berlakon..tapi tak semestinya takde standard.so, sbb dah sign up, nak tak nak,it is my obligation and responsibility to show up an d buat keje.even though terpaksa mengorbankan jemaah tarawih kat surau.bkn tak blh buat sorg2 or dgn kawan2 kat umah.bkn wajib buat 8rakaat..buatla 2 je pun, asalkan ikhlas.tapi ada jgk org yg fkr, kalau tak g tarawih tu, cm dosa besar sangat..mmgla, kalau compare ngn lepak mall, seganla kot, orang g surau, kte g lepak2 plak. tapi bagi aku la..tarawih berbanding ngn keje, yang dah diamanahkan dan melibatkan ramai orang, dah kira wajib kita pegi buat keje tu, sbb tanak sshkn orang lain. karang sape2 marah kat kita dapat dosa free je.so, tak pegi tarawih kat surau ni bknla perkara besar sgt, selagi dia tak g buat bende2 tak berapa nak best di bulan puasa.

taktau la nape aku nak ckp pasal ni, tp mcm terpanggil2 nak tulis.
orang kata, kalau nak jd alim, warak, mst solat, buat amalan2 sunat2, tadarus quran, g ceramah,pakai jubah longgar2, or apa2la yg berkaitan dgn agama.mmg betul.tak dinafikan.tula yang sebaik2nya.tapi, kalau seseorang tu tak jd perfect mcmtu, tak semestinya dia kufur, or berdosa.and bagi aku, menegakkan agama, bukan dari segi agama semata2.hidup ni as a whole perlu dikira sebagai agama. as in, bkn perkara2 fardhu, beribadat siang malam je yg Allah nampak, yg Allah kira.tp ada jgk benda duniawi yg perlu diambil kira. kalau la solat siang malam, tp lambat bangun g kerja (or class), tuhan senang hati ke?tu lagi la kira berdosa sbb dah membuat dosa sesama manusia. amanah kita sbg pekerja, pelajar(lg2 yg sponsored)sangat besar.tak blh la nak fkr solat 24jam tp kita tak kesah pasal reputasi sbg pelajar muslim. belajar tu wajib.belajar di atas nama islam adalah jihad. taknak la nanti orang kata,kata islam, tapi mundur.aku mmg malu kalau dlm PBL aku ada pelajar melayu yg datang lambat, melayu la yg ponteng.sbb dlm PBL, ada lbh kurang 3 pelajar melayu je, out of 10 or 11.so, nampak sgtla kan kalau ada yg kurang.tp mmg slalu mcmtu la, melayu la yg ponteng, melayu la yang fail.nak tak nak, nama agama sekali yg malu.aku kagum bila yani cerita pasal sesetengah student2 melayu kat uniten(if im not mistaken).dgn tudung litup, pgg quran all the time, tp CGPA takde yg kurang 3.9.mcmtu la islam yg sepatutnya.lengkap.bukan warak beribadah semata, tp cemerlang dunia akhirat.
lastly, aku bukan kata aku ni warak or hebat gle std.dua2 pun tak rasanya.tp cukupla seiringkan agama dan duniawi.lebihkan agama lagi bagus, tp jgn tinggalkan kewajipan duniawi.
orang melayu islam tak boleh jadi malas.ni punca kelemahan dan kenunduran kita!

freakin IMU

i sometimes feel like regretting being into IMU.we have obviously less class/day compared to the other medical schools.and NO TUTORIALS, okay?so, we are supposed to do lots of self learning, and to do that, it requires a lot of motivation.yela, at our very own sweet free time, what do we tend to do 1st?mstla bukak facebook jap, blogging jap.(akulah mangsa facebook terbaru.walaupun takdela menarik sgt fb ni)and studies come last..ok coming back to the issue here, dahla class sikit sgt,it is like 2 hours a day, clinical skills session once a week, PBL twice a week, n now they want to implement a system of e-learning where they put some sort of articulated lectures on net, and mansuhkan classes.kalau cmtu WHATS THE POINT OF PAYING A BLOODY SUM OF 28k PER SEMESTER, WHICH TOTALS UP TO ABOUT 300k FOR THE WHOLE 5 FREAKING YEARS IN IMU?? just to get lecture notes WHICH WE HAVE TO PRINT OURSELVES is it?their reason is, some of the students complain that they do not need lectures to succeed.dah camtu kau je la yang takyah datang lecture.i pity the students whom their parents pay for their fees, because they are not getting what their money worth.i am a bit less unfortunate la, because i am sponsored by the government, and tak terasa sangat beban student yg self sponsor.tapi memang ini tak patut terjadi di universiti taraf antarabangsa!

outing.

out to town today..went to sogo, with raiha, and my two little brothers.saje shopping2 raya before bz, selagi ada masa..i decided to go on weekdays to avoid the crowd.of course sogo was crowded like all the time, but today it was not so.still boleh shopping tanpa sebarang physical contact dgn oranglain.teman adik2 carik baju2 raya.ssh nak teman diorang.taste lg tinggi dr aku.patutla mama malas nak teman diorang.budak2 lelaki sedang membesar. mula2 pegi jln TAR (its sad that dat ppl are calling it in short, sbb nama Tunku sdh takde lg disebut pada nama jln tu).nak beli telekung baru yg cun2.kedai2 dia banyak, n they are all selling the same things.i wandered around, tgk2 kat kedai2 tu before beli.once i belek2, dorang dah mcm bagi discount mcm2, pastu blm ckp pape lg dah nak amek bag plastik.n they were practically begging me not to go and buy the telekung straight away from their stall.kesian sangat....i feel like buying things from all of them.bayangkanla, too little customers, and tooo many similar stalls, and similar stuffs!so imagine how they fight for customers.i always wonder why ppl tend to open similar kind of businesses eg fruit stalls, fabric store, etc etc too close to each other? are they all allocated to the same business venue by some authorities,perhaps?i dunno.i know nothing about business.next, midvalley.my 2nd brother wanted to buy his things at topman. his justification was, kat situ senang nak carik slim, tightfitting shirt.makin besar, makin kecik baju diorang.adik paling last belum terikut2 abang2 dia lagi, but sooner or later i bet he will.hehe.takpela, aku pun sama, lagi teruk.dah membesar, saiz baju tak besar2.tapi aku tak la pakai tightfitting shirt.at least not too tight.sedang2 sahaja.segan okey.but i'll try to improve the way i present myself, and membesarkan, not to forget memanjangkan saiz baju2 di masa akn datang.insyaallah.bila sampai rumah, kaki sangat sakit (cos i was sooo bijak to wear heels just because they matched the color of my dress the best).padan muka.bila balik rumah, lepak2 a while, and went straight to class.pathology of pituitary.nasib baik tak tido.so kesimpulannya..takde kesimpulan.bye2 for now.

2nd day of semester 4

as expected, things move at a very fast pace. 2 days over, but the workload is dreadful.finished CSU wk 1 (good!) and diagnostic english test. class today started at 415 and ended at 630.when we reached pakcik amir's stall, there is not much left.tak seronok.but im glad that today i did not experience any kind of headache which i usually have in evenings(normally it happens when i have things until evening, or excessive walk or going to malls the whole day or overcrowding).i planned to start revising early today, however its the other way round.im still sitting here in front of this stupid screen, facebooking.i know this would happen.i was so glad that friendster has became obsolete(so that i can reduce the temptation to go online) until i started facebooking.bahaya ni.better stop.im stopping now.tata~

sensitive sket blh takk??

tadi,masa bukak puasa, tertengokla cerita 3R kat tv3.frankly i dont really like that show.and today ada statu benda lagi yg ak tak berapa puas hati ngn cte tu.dulu..few episodes back(tu pun tertengok jgk) ada la surat dari pembaca punya segment.soalan dia cmnila.."kak, saya berusia 17 tahun yadaa yadaa..blh kah saya dan pasangan saya melakukan hubungan seks?"pastu that so-called motivator(kak azah-no title)ckpla.."kalau blh jangan laa..sbb nanti adik dpt STD..and nanti kalau mengandung siapa yang susah...tunggu la selepas kahwin ye?"and hari ni plak ada short sketch, bf dia ckp"sayang2, kte kan dah jadi couple almost 6 months kan...ape kata kte buat sth lebih intimate lagi?"..then gf dia kata(n btw, dorg ni skolah lagi).."eh,blhke?kalau mengandung cmne??"...pastu bf dia reply.."ala first time tak mengandung punye"(bodoh jgk dua ekor ni)pastu there was this pakar who clarified that every time buat hubungan seks boleh mengandung, provided that perempuan tu subur time tu..and after that terus couple tu decided to wait until they get married(if only).

so kesimpulannya..takde sorang or sekali pun dalam cte tu ckp buat seks sebelum kahwin tu haram.cam norm je.norm ke tak, haram tetap haram.dosa ttp dosa, bdk tadika pun tau..cte tu cm tak sensitive. n terlalu moden..tak sesuai jadi talk show untuk remaja.oke?harap maklum.

p/s ada bnyk jgk cte yg terlalu moden yang aku menyampah.mentang2 muka cm mat salleh sket dah tak ingat root.padahal nama cm jawa.

sem 4 here i come(nada tak berapa semangat)~

esok start sem 4.esok pagi2 dah ada PBL.bkn tak puas cuti,bukan tak semangat, tp takut..sbb makin lama makin byk cabaran, i figured out dat after dah 3 semester, i still cant find a way to get myself really really prepared for exam.nasib baikla sem ni takde exam.but theres summative test.and muet.still, this is not a honeymoon semester.still have to work hard.no more time to waste.

i also signed up to be one of the theater production team for Malay Cultural Week diz september.jadi member of stage design.i have ZERO experience or knowledge about theater.unlike my boyfriend who have tons of experience in that(and never liked to share).however, i just want to get myself involved in something, not medically related.uni life shud be filled with experience, lotsa activities(beneficial activities yea adik2!) and fun!(though i know its hard to juggle).being a student should not just being all about studies.it have to be about the life experience we gain.i hope this semester is going to be much better than the previous.and i hope Muna(the theater producer) dont expect me to have any experience about theater, cos i have NONE!the only experience i have in stage designing was being a member of biro keceriaan in boarding school (we prepared stage in events,designing, coloring, sketching, do stuff like gubah bunga(hehe) and set fountains) tu pun i bet it'd be nothing like designing a stage for a theater.

okay have to start revising the anatomy for endocrinology.i hope i will not look so dumb tomorrow.

finally.

finally.elective ends.teribbly.there r things that ive learnt.but not much.since we are only 2nd year meds student, all we can do is observe and ask and take note.blh jgk buat physical examination, tp takut plak, nanti tersalah palpate or percuss patient kat emergency department tu nanti, patah ribs dia, sape yg susah?some doctors are friendly.but most of them not.knp kne jd sombong ble dah jd doctor eh?in A&E, all we did was observing procedures, and no one cares if we were in or not..sbb masing2 busy.kalau mcmtu xpela..xleh nak slhkn sesape.because they r not paid to guid us.lagi2 la bdk IMU 2nd year yg taktau pape lg ni.tp serious stress kat sana, jalan2, tgk2, kadang2 tanya2 sket.kadang2 pg cafe makan2 sket.nobody cares.kat HUSM as what friends told me, they were assigned specialists, so bermakna sket la elective dorg.but this is life as a medical student, ikut nasib, mmg slalu akan kene marah, kalau sikit dah x tahan mmg takleh survive.ada org smpai takut nak dtg class sbb takut kne marah ngn lecturer.i take this elective as a endurance test.and to foresee how my life will look like in the future,kalau houseman dianggap mcm ameoba dlm hospital, medical student, lagi kecik, mcm virus.(kecik tp bahaya tau,jgn main2).okay.sudahla hospital ipoh.i may not come back, but if i were to work there again, u better take me seriously next time.

finally.holiday is nearly over.sem 4 is about to start.first day, ada PBL.have to be prepared.azam baru setiap sem, jadi nye tak. but i realise that i dont have much time until EOS5.raami orang yg suka cuti, takmau masuk cls balik..but not for me.kata la ape pun.skema ke, nerd ke.for me, sikap macamtu yg buat orang melayu terkebelakang.sikap malas.i am neither superduper rajin nor excellent gila in exams, however, i do not dare to let myself being lazy,being ordinary.

finally, ramadhan is coming.i just hope this one would be much better than before.semoga aku dapat hidayah bulan ramadhan ini.amin~

weekend in ipoh

we went out to jusco/kinta city ipoh.went shopping, lunch, and bowling.i can say, jusco kat situ besar, and if i were to do my housemanship kat ipoh pun sanggup kot..selain perasaan jauh hati kepada hospital ipoh itu....went home around 730pm.keluar balik for dinner at 930.dine in at a mamak place tepi sungai kinta, and the place was big, and the interior makes me feel like im in a mediterranean restraunt or something.lawa.ipoh malam2 mmg cantik..neon lights in most of the roads.but the thing that is prominent in ipoh is that.ramai orang melepak tepi jalan.cos they have this padang, and dataran that are dark and gloomy enuff for them to do some hang ups.ye ke?memandai je..and secondly, kampung2 kat ipoh, banyak sgt kedai makan..sangaaaattt....satu kampung tu estimated to have around 20 restaunts, or at least foodstall.and my ipoh friend tu penah rasa makanan at almost all of the places.orang ipoh mmg tak suka masak kot?the weekend wasnt really a failure.though we planned to go to penang but didnt.
sunday-nak pegi PC fair.though im not into this stuff, i am willing to go as long as im not stuck home alone.kene wear mask ke?yikes hope not!

skarang orang suka sgt pakai mask eh?its a good thing laa..tp bdk2 skolah lepak2 ddk je kat kerusi2 mall tu pun pakai mask.sekadar nak ddk2 je baik ddk2 kat umah je.PMR pun tak lepas lagi, suka sangat melepak!

i want to go home!!

friday.

the mask is killing me.i feel very dizzy and i feel like vomitting in that.i was breathing in my very own exhaled hot air, and that did not feel good, okay?menyusahkan betul la H1N1 ni!dah tahan dah, so i decided to lepak at the library.had a chat with siddarth, andwent back to emergency dept to check on them.when i reached A&E, the doctors were busy putting on a chest tube into a chest of a male patient who i believe to suffer from pneumothorax.lps tu ada a couple of students datang(from RMCP), and few mins later, officer kat A&E tu pggl bdk2 IMU.dia ckp sbb A&E ni dah sesak so dia srh ktorang pg blek ke office, and apply for new department.i was like what the heck?we came here earlier then those RMCP(Royal Medical College Perak) students, ktorang plak yg kne pegi?
ok2 fine..ni kan teaching hospital korang..hamek la..tak ingin pun.

then we headed to Greentown Mall again.sbb Ema dah mimpi2 nak beli handphone kat ctu, sbb murah dr harga kat KL.makan kat foodcourt.i ordered tomyam.pastu few minutes later i tny dia, dah masak ke blm, dia kata blm, so i kata, tuka la..nasi gorang ayam.pastu dia kata, kalau tuka kne masuk queue blek.lambat la..i cakap npe la plak?tuka je..pastu dia cm tak phm2 so i dgn bengang nye blah je.dahla before that ada budak2 main gelak2 tolak2 gedik2 dpn aku, pastu terlanggar aku.dia ckp sorry.aku senyum2 tak ikhlas.dah la makanan smpai lambat.dorg dah abes mkn baru nak sampia mknn.bengang nyeee...dah la food court tu pnh ngn stdnt RMCP tu..rasa nak set food court tu on fire je.

tension ptg2 kat cni, sbb asek tdo je.yg lain2 sume tdo lama, and malas nak kuar, so things are soooo boring here.weekend ni cam nak balik KL je, tp takde orang nak amek plak..gila la kot nak ddk cni lama2.

apa2la.survivr jela.
the moral is.jgn buat elective kat hosp ipoh.buat ket tmpt kne bayar.at least they assign doctors to guide.
kalau dah jd doctor tu, jgn la sombong sgt kat medical student.cm dorg tak pnh cmtu je.ntah2 lagi teruk.blah laa doctor2 yg sombong tu.
doctor2 yg baik yg slalu entertain ktorang kat A&E tu, thankyou a lot.tapi takpela..mggu dpn ktorang bawak diri g O&G plak.jgn cakap rindu kat ktorang plak eh abg awe?(MA pujaan kak hasni)

nak balik cepat.cptla masuk sem, dah nak sakit otak cuti ni.kemalasan kills.

third day of ipoh hospital elective

ok.1st day was a total disaster.we came early at 8 but it seemed like they werent ready.the vice director wasnt in.so kteorang takleh stast taht day.we went home with frustration.mmgla geram.ktorang dah bwk official letter, blh lak kata tak confirm.ktorang balik n that evening we head to air terjun Chepor in Chemor.mandi puas2.xramai sgt orang, so ktorang buat tmpt tu mcm ktorang pny je.2nd day, we came n at 3.bcos dah ptg, penat, so we came home early.went to greentown mall.find some stuff, then head home.rasa cm penat je, sbb takde byk benda yg dibawa, tade pape sgtla nak buat.today was the 3 rd day, and things have been a bit better. we came in at 8, and after a brief chat with the MO in charge in the semi critical ward in emergency department, we starting observing any procedures done on the casualties. At first, the ward was a bit empty, but after a while, the buzzer started to buzz very frequently.i short buzz for semi criitcal ward.so we know that an emergency case is about to be presented.and at about 9, the ward was congested, and chaotic to the extent that they have to pull in plastic chairs for the not very critical patients to be seated.nowadays orang yang demam pun dah kne masuk emergency ward.

basically dlm ramai2 patient tu, ada satu dua case yg aku tertarik utk write down. a 67 yr old pakcik who believed to be a psiciatric patient was lying down on a bed for a while now.i tny ngn MO tu, what is he all about, the doctor said sbnry takde pape..just dia stressed,physically stable.dlu dah pnh discharged, tp anak2 dia anta balik ke hospital with so many excuses.myb sebab leceh nak jaga.pakcik tu cerita, dalam 8 orang anak dia, sorang je yg jaga dia.tu pun anak dia yg sorang tu keje, so nobody is taking care of him, talk to him, give him love.he prefers to stay at the hospital rather than being left alone, without any love given. dia kata buat apa balik , takde orang yg nak bagi mkn ubat, kat hospital ada orang jaga..sebak jgk dgr..nak nangis pakcik tu bercerita.sedih sangat..napela anak2 buat orang tua mcmtu..myb la ssh nak jaga, tapi tak ingat ke mcmana dorang jaga kte dari kecik, anak2 dah besar pun lagi ssh nak jaga.tp taktaula mungkin nanti one day aku terasa mcmtu jgk, tp mtk dijauhkanla..

anothe case yg comel,a boy, known asthmatic, present with acute respiratory exercabation.ble nak withdraw blood and nak infuse meds I/V, MA tu tak blh nak cari median cubital vein dia.jarum tu masuk, kuar blek, for many times.bdk tu meraung2, screaming "tolong la kuar...tolonglaaa.." sedih pun ada, comel pun ada. dah la tembam budak tu. tapi sedih la sbb mak dia nangis2..mak dia ckp, tu la adik, mama kata jg main kat luar lama2, adik degil, jangan minum ais, adik degil...lepas itu saya bace buku and tido di library.haha.

tiba2 rindu mama saya.

okie mahu stdy fot tomoro.

a lot of youtube today.

yesterday,had a long walk+chat+shopping+gossiping with two of my good-forever-together mates nabilah(bee) n dhuha.it was nice to just sit down and chat..ive been wanting to see bee ever since she flew back here from poland but she was busy with her hospital rotations.bee slept over last night, and we stayed up late because dhuha was busy packing her stuff, for her and yani's backpacking trip.and they left at around 4 in the morning.siap bergambar dlm gelap lagi.semangat.nasib baik dhuha tak terus pakai sunglasses that she just bought dr dlm rumah lg.heee kiddin.and after subuh i was soooo tired and slammed back to bed.oh,no.on the sofa.we all slept at the hall last night.and this noon, bee went home,after another long chat.berborak tak habis2.then, i said to myself..ok mira..study..u r going to ipoh in a day time u dont wanna look stupid and end up napping in the surau like u did in PD hospital do you?so i took my newly bought Oxford Handbook of Clinical Medicine, and started to read.but i felt so alone(the juniors are going to their classes pagi2 lagi)so i decided to switch on my laptop and get online.i dont really like going online, because i get boring easily.then i remember a you tube video dhuha ws watching the other day.The video was from an Australian muallaf, Kimberly who is usually known as Kimdonesia who has been producing a lot of videos about Islam, fashion in Islam, or just random things about her.Then in started clicking to every other videos of her.She is very popular in Youtube, and plus, she is veryyyy cute.then i studied a bit before getting distracted again.hmmm..so in summary, i did a little study today, and a lot of youtube.

The same like what dhuha commented in her blog, this girl really amaze me too.She is still young, younger than me if im not mistaken, but she thinks better than most of the Muslims out there. It makes me ponder for a while, she's new and she's very good.but ive been raised as Muslim, n yet i could not be as religious as her.i am ashamed of myself for a while.hmm..i have to do a lot of self-revision.frankly, i am not proud to be the person i am now, i still want to improve.i do not want to be the kind of Muslim woman who disgrace this pure religion.And i am worried with how our Malay kids and youngters grow nowadays.there are too much of unthinkable things that happen nowadays, which you never want to think of.i dont want to be one of them.i dont wanna go to hellfire plsss God.

Take me to your light...

mind your language..

bahasa malaysia..an issue that people nowadays politicized.if u ask me,i would say,language is just language.its just a medium to communicate.no big deal.orang kata,pelihara bahasa malaysia..jgn rojakkan etc etc.thats true..but for me,in order to preserve bahasa malaysia is simply by learning that language..be able to speak well in Malay..so that takdela one day if people ask you the meaning of something in Malay,u fail to answer. tu mmg teruk gila la tu.you practise it or not in daily basis is totally up to the individual.bahasa rojak tu in my opinion takdela masalah sgt sbnrnye.i remember when i was in Kem KO-PLN(its a one-week motivational camp which those going abroad to study have to attend),the facilitator commented on my language. Bahasa rojak.Yea i did use a cocktail of English and Malay in one presentation,but i have a reason for doing that.I have a bit of problem using Bahasa Malaysia baku in presentation..bukan sengaja,bkn buat2..but it is just it.So i ended using bahasa rojak. But it was only a casual presentation, not Bahasa Malaysia presentation..so apa masalah nya..kalau presentation sastera BM guna english mmg nak kne la ngn Mak Temah aka Kak Tim(i miss pn fatimah,my BM teacher in SAMURA).

Berbalik pada topik bahasa rojak tadi,we cannot stop people from using bahasa rojak.its just how Malaysians communicate.bila cakap bahasa baku karang orang kata buang tebiat.as long as people undestand what we are trying to convey, it should never be an issue. buka Bahasa melayu je yg rojak..Japanese ke, Cantonese ke, rojak jgk...tak caye cube dgr themesong kartun2 jepun kat tv tu..dlm satu ayat tu mula2 japanese..last2 ada la pulak terselit english..cakap bahasa rojak tu lagi okay drpd cakap bahasa melayu, tp penuh ayat mencarut2,curse2.lagi teruk.

Bahasa SMS pun blh jadi isu.Dah kata nak SMS je,tulis pendek2 sudahla..takpayah la tulis panjang2 just for the sake of preservering BM(haha macam mak aku dlu,,skrg dah tak=P)

one more thing, isu lagu rojak..a song is one's way of expressing feelings.dah time tu dia rasa dia nak campur2 bahasa sukati dia la..tanak dgr sudah..dia bkn letak lagu dia tu dalam kategori lagu bahasa melayu pun..what language people want to utilize in a song ke, poem ke..its totally their rights.(dlu aku teringat radhi OAG mengamuk sbb dia kne condemn lagu dia rojakkan bahasa melayu..nah who cares.asalkan sedap)

PPSMI, the latest issue.i dont quite agree with the idea of teaching maths and science back in BM. I dont think the arguments supporting it were reasonable enough... I think children should be taught science and maths in english as early possible..so that later in their education life, there's no major problem faced by them..if they are to be taught in Malay, later mase nak masuk uni, the transition phase would be a little harder, and coping process will be a bit more tedious.tp biarla,dah tu keputusan kerajaan..but on the other hand,ok la sbb takde la student2 kat kampung or yg lemah in english tercicir,and worse, demotivated nak belajar.tapi tu la, that is just a short-term benefit.

btw,ckp pasal PPSMI, haritu masa Arwah Yasmin Ahmad meninggal dunia, i just knew that angin ahmar tu stroke!i thot asthma!tu pun my mama yang ckp(my Malay needs polishing as well!) so cancel PPSMI ni ade la jgk kebaikannya..so that nanti ble dah kat hospital nanti, takdela salah faham=P

malu dgn negara sendiri?

i dont like football.the last time i watched was fifa 2002(if im not mistaken la)n that was solely because of this one cute korean player i spotted.terus aku tgk smpai abes..the football match everyone's waitting for (Man U vs Malaysia) has ended,and the result wasnt much dissaponting either..mmgla Man U ramai peminat..i assume antara ramai2 yg datang tu mst pakai jersey Man U yg dorg worship sgt tu..kalau ada yg pakai jersey Malaysia mst kne boo kot? But u see..dont u guys have any sense of patriotisme smpai fanatic sgt nak sokong org luar?okay la,say u guys worship those ppl so much..and to just support them is still fine with me..tp jgnla smpai suka sangat nak mengutuk team negara sendiri..people were condemning Malaysian team even before they show what theyve got..and ive heard(or read) a number of comments like "ala,nak lawan Man U,xsedar diri ke..?", "agaknya brp dorg kalah eh?" "blh jalanla.." ..and that disgusts me..a lot.

mmg nature orang kita kot.suka sangat tgk bangsa sendiri jatuh.suka sgt kne jajah.dulu kne jajah negara,skrg ideologi n minda kne jajah.

Malaysia today..

i went out to Mid Valley today, at around 2pm.It has been a long time since i last took a train anywhere..if my boyfriend is out of town (he's stdying in outside of KL) i am partly immobilized because nobody's going to drive me anywhere..(except my mom,but dont wanna bother her too many times) n yeah, i have a P licence but too anxious to drive alone.anyway..KTM train is never improving.lagi lmbat adela..i waited for a very long time..and to sum up,after a long one hour only i managed to reach midvalley..where's d improvement u promised ??finally the train arrived,i saw a Caucasian woman wearing a mask scooted out ofthe train.I was actually kind of reluctant to take a train lately due to H1N1..tp redah je la..kalau nak dpt tu mana2 pun leh dpt..i sat on a seat next to the door.next to me is a Bangladeshi man(i guess so?)and a couple of his friends.I was actually being paranoid about the flu pandemic so i tried my best not to touch anything on the train..n i was actually breathing very shalowly(sbb tanak inhale in any germs la tu) haha.. like that helps~

until somehing caught my eyes..i saw a row of seats fully occupied by ppl.There were 10 ppl altogether.From a quick glance,i saw only 3 Malays out of taht number.another 3 were arabics, 3 chinese, and the others are Bangladeshi(note that i only use the word Bangladeshi to describe them,easier..however they may be Nepalese,Sri Lankan..who knows?).Then i took a quick look at my surronudings..i was swarmed by those people! Are we outnumbered by them?Why are there too many immigrants in our country?It may make Malaysia look a bit colorful, i agree..but i think its a bit too much.We see immigrants anywhere we go..And does not include those foreigners who marry the locals or work here..and trying to get PR here.Malaysia has becoming more and more like a charity country.More and more immigrants means less job opportunities to our local youngsters..xtaula salah siapa smpai dorg import too much of PATIs..maybe because its cheaper..or mmg anak muda Malaysia malas kerja..?malas nak comment,aku bukan tau sgt pun..pandai2la fikir..

showbiz in Malaysia

i dont really like Malaysian celebrities.They talk like angels but act like demons.And Malaysian celebrities are picking up this habit of socializing too much and dressing up like they are hollywood celebs.They go clubbing, partying, not to mention they are also not ashamed of being drunk.yeah of course hollywood celebrities are extremely good at that,but i care less bout them.they did nothing wrong.Cerai berai, mabuk2..i see no quality in Malaysian artistes.lagi2 la nak jd kn idol.sorry.

but yeah bukan semua yg mcmtu..i still like some..faizal tahir,aizat's songs are cool too..n i like ashraf muslim n oh yea,tomok the boy next door.very,polite i wud say..haha(new obsession)but not to the extent of making them my idol ..hehe

i dont really like the fact taht now, even little kids are encouraged and exposed to the showbiz..teens berebut2 nak masuk reality shows, with the excuse of making easy money. bila kuar,(mentor ke, mentee ke ape lagi ha?)tak kuar2 tv pun..popular kejap je..when those reality,money making shows are prospering,semakin kurang teens yg usaha keras nak ubah hidup..sume nak masuk singing contest, jadi artis etc etc.

but nvrmind..none of my bussiness anyway..

a talk by Tun Dr Mahathir

We had a dialogue session with Dr Mahathir early this morning in IMU. as expected, the hall was packed, the most of seats were occupied by the time i arrived. After a looong talk by the Directors of IMU finally its time for D Mahathir to talk. Dr Mahathir, i would say is a man with wisdom, and good sense of humour. He talked about many things, which i would write down 4 us to ponder upon.

1.Looking at the global economic crisis nowadays, it is likely that we are NOT able to achieve vision 2020 ON year 2020. But he thinks Malaysia has been developing so fast(as compared to the other Asian counterparts and regardless of the 4 mighty and long occupations by British, Japanese etc etc) that we are so close to become developed country one day. Malaysia used to concentrate so much on Agriculture, but now the Industrial, education, tourism also have been growing so well.

2.He highlighted that loyalty to the country is the utmost importance once we graduate as medical doctors. We grow up in Malaysia, educated in Malaysia, and were given privileges in education so much that we could study anywhere in the world sponsored by the Malaysian government. The government is investing a lot in the search of the 'doctors' that can serve the country. How can some students fly off to America or UK just because they offer higher salary. Some are even willing to pay back the government just to turn their backs from serving the country. Like Tun mentioned, they offer u high salary, but the living expenses are also high..apela sgt.. We have to have a sense of patriotisme, to finish medical degree in time, and serve the nation as we are expected to.

3.A person asked about his recipe of making Malaysia prosper. He replied, peace among the races that makes Malaysia prosper.

4.Dr Mahathir told us the story about how he first jumped into politics. He was concsious about politics in Tanah Melayu when he was only a school boy. However, he was just a young schoolboy, nobodys going to take him seriously.So he decided to go to medical school to be a doctor, with the hope that with that qualification , he would be able to be looked up, and to be heard. Then after a while he practised medicine, he became Malaysia's 4th PM, who then changed this country for good.

5.The next question sounds like this.."How do you think being in medical field helped u to become a good politician?"

he answered.."political problems are the same as medical cases.The way to approach them is not very diffrent either. Take history, do physical examination, do lab investigations, n prescribe solution to it. Way to approach medical cases is very methodical, and it should be the same when we approach any other problems we face.And thats how being a medical student is an advantage!=)

I dont quite understand some part of the talk when he started to calculate national profit.all i remembered hearing were 'million' and 'billion'.

Anyhow, he makes me think a lot today.n surely it was a good talk by him. I managed to snap a picture of him and Dr Siti Hasmah, however as there were a lot of ppl swarming him when i snaped the photo, the photo was not of a very good quality.so i decided to put a nicer picture of him here=)

there's always a start for everything~

i hated blogging,though i read other's at times, i still hate to start one of my own.however, the long holiday urges me to do something i do not usually like.like blogging.i bet once i start sem4 in August this poor blog of mine would be left alone.but lets just hope i wont turn out dat way.